aye i thought and thought and thought.
never once did it leave my mind. the close similarity between what happened before and now. could it juz be yet again history repeating itself? i dare not think of it this way. maybe it's a slight difference that this time there's a spoken level of commitment. but when previously i simply believed what was said to me at it's level can i still do the same this time? how can i be so sure that what was spoken iz to be for sure, to be true? how can i be so sure that the future iz within the control of words? how can i be so sure so certain so.. hopelessly gulible?
stop daydreaming.
i was told. by bk.
stop daydreaming. that was my trigger of thoughts. it's more than a year more before bk allows the venture.. how can i be sure that in time to come things will still be the same? hmmm.. well that was the interesting and sudden fellowship we had with bk. it really iz sudden :D
well.. so that was saturday for me.
recap a little more...
25may, friday.
third day of titans. 7k team run, log relays. log throws for the guys.
geex. well this iz the day for the events we have all never trained for. and we did them all. and i'm not ashamed to say we did them in pretty bad shape ): well.. 7k was good that we managed to run it all without any gaps. so no point deduced.. but yuanjing almost fainted due to overexhaustion. and because we continued running we had 5points demerit for lack of consideration of safety for team. timing clocked by alpha was bad. very bad. 49mins as timed by wilson. traffic lights were against us very much. irritating. after 7k there was the log throws. well i'd say alpha didn't do very well.. but cant be blamed. i tink the instructors was ****ed up too. biased idiots. got wilson and i pretty down staring at all the other house's no counts being counted. thanks alpha hc and whoever else who dedicated a song to both of us with the message of "cheer up" (: thanks. after that log relay. we ran we tried we really did. it isn't easy to run with the log. in fact it's bad. 3bruises on my right shoulder all because of that run. 2of which are on my bone so it hurts really bad. anyway.. during the run after my leg i overheard an instructor saying alpha girls sure can run.. waha. well done girls. esp my team comprising of yuanjing phyllis and yasmine. we actually came in first for our leg (: but team alpha came in third for the log relay.
i was really glad titans was over. finally. all the disappointments, dishearten-ments and discouragements all over and done with. i rejoiced at it's end even though we didn't perform very well on the last day. so off we trotted to the hall for prize giving.. not expecting to receive anything. as we walked the guys played.. bouncing off the inflatables.. it was fun juz watching them have fun (: well in the hallll.... prize giving.. cherlyn got best performance for situps(expected)!!! :D and i got best performace for squat thrusts and surprisingly shuttle run. gosh i was shocked. i'm serious i was!!!! i always thought grace would do better for the shuttle suicides cuz netballers are great at em.. but i clocked a 6.02mins for 2runs combined. wow. i'm amazed at myself. haha. well grace obviously got the best performance for 5k with 28min++ and melissa khoo got the one for incline with 36.. WE MISSED BY TWOOOO!!!!! oh well..! and delta got clinched champ for titans07. congrats delta.
but den again....... top10 titans (:
wilson came in 7th? there was adri in 6th? and nicholas lau in SECOND!!! so pro. haha (:
yasmine came in....... top10 x) i cant rem...!!!! cherlyn came in 2nd (: and i came in first. i'm amazed at myself. but my dad keeps saying it's a legacy kept forever in tj history. my family's proud of me (: at least i didn't let em down. ms titans 2007. but i'm still nat (: the nat you know the nat everyone knows. (:
oh and i forgot to say. THANK YOU CHUANLI for making that veryyyy last minute substitution!!! though you didn't get any sleep and you were aching but you still did alpha proud. thank you so very much!!
after titans in school ended. chuanli and i headed down to ITEsimei for waterpolooooo (: haha. first time playing and i'd say it was fun. except playing against the swimmers cuz they owned us like noone's business. :D well playing against the other learners was more fun cuz there's such thing out-swimming them for the ball x) yeah i outswam them and got the ball.. but against the swimmers i juz conserved my energy no point. haha. yeah. and trying to trap water and stay afloat was never more tiring. trying to bounce off the floor of the pool wiht only my right leg made my right calf really tight and it almost crampped. haha. at least i didn't cramp!! =P chuanli and kenneth had calf cramps for a really long period of time :D but nonetheless it was fun playing the water and of cuz playing waterpolo. it's wayyyyyy rough k. i saw neritta literally pressing a girl in front of her down into the water like wanting to drown her. tsktsk!!!
after waterpolo i went to find my mum in her office. slept a while den my mum's colleague joined me and my mum for dinner at "miss u cafe" :D the ambience iz great in there (: the food was not bad except the beetroot sauce kinda destroyed my liking for my meal. but my mum's speghetti was yummy (: they offer such thing as mixed cream and tomato sauce x) yum. and i had yummy 'sinful treats' for dessert. double choc ice cream with marshmallow covered in fudge (: yumyum simply irresistable.
after dinner headed home with my mum. on the bus the weirdest thing happened. it was juz bout 4busstops away from my busstop.. there was this guy who was apparently sleeping on the bus.. he slept until he fell off the chair with a thud and he still continued sleeping on. o.O like oh my gosh. the funny thing iz that i didn't know that happened until my mum told me someone fell off the chair. gosh. he literally slept like a log. and he didn't wake up. for 4busstops. at my stop i had to tap him more than 5times asking him if he was okay when he finally woke up and faster got off the bus in a daze. lolx.
came home. tired. tried to contact some friends for service the next day. negative negative and more negative. went to bed in disappointment and heaviness.
26may, saturday.
woke up and the first thing i read on my phone was this,
"2cor 4:16-18
Therefore we do not lose heart............"
thank you ailin. the others iz not important. cuz i only needed this statement. not losing heart. i woke up continued calling up. and this time it was really calling. i scrolled my phone book. went online. i hogged the house phone the whole morning til i left house. thank you to those who came down. thanks debbie, chinkai, wilson, amanda, tzejie, dave (: really thanks for taking the time off to come down for the service. esp chinkai and dave and amanda. amanda for cancelling your bible study to come down this week. and chinkai for coming down despite needing to leave early for your own bible study. and dave for staying in sengkang yet coming all the way down.. and den needing to leave early to head to AMK by7. thank you so much for going through all that trouble!!! (:
well.. service was alright.. pretty long but it was alright (: went down to simpang to eat prata again. and i left in a hurry that i forgot to pay for my dinner. x) heh. sorry jonathan!! yeah.. so i left to meet yL at siglap gelare to pass him back his spikes.. all the best for your race on wednesday!! (: and thanks for the chocolate biscuits. came home.
27may, sunday. today.
routine sunday!!!!!! ): tuition but today was SHORT. waha!! yeah!!! it was only slightly past a hour.. but i rem falling asleep a little while as my uncle pondered for a very long time over a question :D den went down to my grandma's slacked and ate alot den headed down to bugis to meet rae and jud. was early so went window shopping for a while. crowded. but i sooooo feel like going out to earn my own keep and finally get to go shopping. sigh. i cant wait to go out into the working society. the grass will always be greener on the other side. x) after meeting jud we walked to NAFA for melly's concert (: the place was wow. nicely furnished and grand and quiet and very formal on the inside.. and the concert was great not bad (: melly played quite a number of pieces.. so talented. violin and piano. wow. but the last piece was a little long and draggy.. i almost dozed off =X sorry!!!
after the concert ended.. jud and i walked back towards parco. got a bread to eat and she got mac. headed home. stoned the rest of the night. i thought bout quite a number of things. all thanks to my dad. he helped me rub my bruises on my knee and shoulder. and as he rubbed he nagged me on.. haha.. and he was telling me to go on a cert collection spree.. dun care if you'll use the skills taught in the course or not juz get the cert. o.O!!! lolx. waste time. oh well!! hopefully my Alevel results turn out good else i'll have to backtrack and replan my outlook in life already.. oh well!!
i guess this iz really one eventful weekend for me (:
geex. i'm tired. i juz realised i really am. physically, mentally emotionally.
*throbs @01:46 <3
There .
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